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Day: March 4, 2007

A Day in the Life…2/24/2015

head.jpg “Greg!, Kathy!, Get up!”

Ernie II, our next gen robot butler tries to wake us from our slumber. He’s not doing too well due to the new pharmaceutical sleep aids flooding the market. Finally, groggily, we crawl to the breakfast table.

A meal awaits us, but due to global warming and species extinction, the only thing left to cook is some sort of sea kelp. “Can’t you make this stuff taste any better ernie?” I ask… “I’ll do better sir, you know new synthetic spices are coming out every day.” ernie retorts..

Our new robot car glides over to pick me up at the breakfast table… don’t even have to walk outside anymore. In fact, I don’t have to walk anywhere. Personal transportation is the name of the game now. It sort of evolved from wheelchair scooters and segways. The bad thing is our legs don’t seem to work to good anymore….

At work, I’m gently dumped in my office chair. My team of robotic repairmen know more than I do now.. their 4D vision, auxiliary brains, and hydraulics pretty much make me a figurehead. I guess there’s always online poker! We don’t even need to work a mouse anymore, we have wi-fi interfaces built into the sides of our heads… an easily done outpatient procedure… been popular for about 3 years now. I have noticed my arms don’t work to good anymore…

The nightly news program is unusually interesting. Humans are shedding their bodies and having their heads encased in a jar. Computer and Virtual Reality interfaces satisfy every need and the company practically promises immortality!

As ernie II tucks us away for the night, I dream of my new jar….

greg

Marcy’s Ramblings

mom.jpgMy oldest son Greg, who is extremely excentric, decided it was time I started using a computer. I had this perfectly good typewriter, although my hands are arthritic it worked for me. I just had to add a footnote to all my correspondence informing the recipient that one finger always hit the letter (D) as I typed, making it necessary to strike all the letter (D’s), before reading, except for the words that were spelled with (d’s), in which case there would be many more (d’s).

He left me with one page of instructions and all this fascinating equipment. It took me fifteen minutes to realize the chair was squeaking, not the mouse!

Words like “the net”, “the web”‘ I’m thinking “the fish”‘ “the spider”!

Anyway, I perservered. I didn’t come up with much, but I know one thing, life is not simple!

First it was the self-service gas pumps. I thought well, I’ll just wait and get gas in the morning. Two nights of sleeping in the car and—–I learned!

I am in the winter of my life, I DO NOT NEED TO STAND ON THE EDGE OF THE CENTURY I AM ABOUT TO DEPART!

I arose from my chair an looked at my son and said “honey, pull the plug”.

Marcy

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